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Desperation!
I'm going to start hocking stuff. First up is a lovely Pierre Laurent watch, complete with different coloured bezels. It actually still keeps time too! Next will be an Esquire Watch, given to me on my birthday two years ago, instead of the couch I'd asked for. I also have a couple of teacups and saucers that are sort of antique and a United States Mint Proof set from 1997. I also came across two Hellraiser Epic comic books, Book 1 and 2. They are in mint condition and could be worth something, who knows? Being poor has its ups and downs (mainly downs). I cut my own bangs today and, although they're uneven, I can see again! Going through my stuff and getting rid of some of it is probably a good thing though, as I own too much garbage as it is. Most of the stuff I plan to hock, my ex-boyfriend gave me. Last to go will be my emerald ring. Not that it has any sentimental value, in fact, when he gave it to me on Valentine's Day he hastily commented: "Don't worry, it's not an engagement ring." But I was born in May and my grandmother, who I was named after, used to buy me emerald rings when I was a kid. She died almost 20 years ago so this was the first emerald ring I'd owned in a long time. So, anyone in the market for an antique teacup?
Canadian Psycho?
 I was up until 3 a.m. last night, reading American Psycho, good book, although my mother tells me apparently it's the novel that inspired convicted rapist/murderer Paul Bernardo's killing spree. The scary thing about this book is that I can identify with the some of the main character's thoughts, like murdering people when he's out to dinner with them, because they are annoying or boorish. I guess the difference between Patrick Bateman and so-called normal people is that sure, we think about things like that but we would never actually go through with them!
Anyway, I'm up until 3, probably didn't get to sleep until 3:30 and at 8 this morning my room mate comes into my room, says she's slept in and can I drive her to work? I can barely open my eyes, but I drag my lazy, unemployed ass out of bed anyway and drive her in. After I dropped her off, I thought about how nice it was that I didn't have to drive into my old office this morning. I hated working for that balding, fat, short, little Mussolini. In fact, I used to have fantasies about an ex-employee walking into that office with a high-powered shotgun and blowing him away. I'm now an ex-employee. Would it be worth 25 years in jail? Nah. I'm just be grateful for the fact that I never have to see the fucker's fat ugly face again.
Ignorant bitches are getting me down
Bible Quote of the Day: Tim 5:13-AND WITHAL THEY LEARN TO BE IDLE, WANDERING ABOUT FROM HOUSE TO HOUSE; AND NOT ONLY IDLE, BUT TATTLERS ALSO AND BUSYBODIES, SPEAKING THINGS WHICH THEY OUGHT NOT. The stupidity of some people amazes me. On a less 'catty' note, page errors are bringing me down.
Fuck, I LOVE Survivor!
 This week's episode breathed new life into a series that, although still enjoyable, was getting predictable. Switching tribe members was an awesome rule change and Silas going this week was funny. I always love it when, the episode before, the person is bragging that they are going to "win it all" then they get voted off the next week!
I have to admit, I'm damned grateful that the gorgeous men are still on it and have dedicated a page to them. Ethan makes me weak in the knees and Lex, well, who wouldn't wanna have just one night of hot, dirty sex with him? Still, I miss Jeff Varner from Survivor 2. He's still the most attractive man from all the shows combined. This show definitely has its Hunks, though...
So It's Come Down To This...
I am very, very poor right now. I have $4 in my wallet and when I went to the bank today, to take out the pathetic $10 I had sitting in there, it turns out it was all gone in service charges. I had 11 cents left. I am now, officially I would say, a fucking bum. At least I sure as hell feel like one. I'm going over to my younger sister's house tomorrow. The last time I saw her, she told me not to feel embarrassed if I needed to borrow money, like $50, say. I honestly had hoped I wouldn't have to take her up on the offer. But what the hell am I supposed to do? I have just over half a tank of gas in my car, a pack of cigarettes that whe gave me, and little else. Oh yeah, here's the topper: My ex-boyfriend (the rich bastard) keeps leaving messages on my phone, saying he'd heard I'd lost another job, and asking if there's anything he can do to help me. In fact there is: he can reach back into the past and unfire me from what was probably my best job ever. That and he can also put a gun in his mouth and pull the trigger. What an Asshole. I just keep believing that things will get better, they always do...
CrotchFartibal
More Farting Basics by CrotchCannibal 'Member when you were in Junior High School and you had to take the physical fitness test? You had to do like, ten push-ups, ten pull-ups, fifty jumping-jacks, run a mile, and lastly... do about twenty sit-ups while some other kid held down your feet? Didn't that suck? Well, not for me, 'cause I'm a physical marvel and I've always been in great shape. But, if you happened to be one of the unfortunate few who, whilst engaged in doing the "sit-up" portion of the event...accidentally released a bit of "ass chatter", well...you became the laughing stock of the entire school for the next three weeks. Yet, as sorry as I feel for those who "bursted in error", I feel even more sympathy for the poor, innocent sod who had the misfortune to be partnered with the farter as their thankless foot holder. I mean, heck, that poor fellow not only had to suffer the verbal barbs of his immature classmates for being in the closest proximity to the farter, but... ...they fuckin' got farted on to boot!!!
Butt plugs
 Blarx's site is back up and running. It feels good to plug Blarx again. Now if only Bob Barker would come back online.
I get my best plugs from The Godfader. Godfader has helped me out so much this past year, and I've never been able to return the favour (mainly because I'm utterly useless). But today he asked me for something I could actually help with: man porn. It seems a woman posted on his board asking for man smut, so Godfader thought I might happen to have some on my hard drive. Fuck me if this was all I could come up with. It seems I have more pictures of nekkid women than men, which is odd, seeing that I love men. The only nude and semi-nude pics of men I have are of camboys. Maybe it's a girly thing. I'm more attracted to a man's body if I know his personality. Speaking of which...  I think I'll start posting with huge-ass fonts from now. It takes less time, but it's more filling. Why can't you just eat hash? It's so fucking harsh. Little hash pills would do me just fine.
Why won't I go to bed??!!
My brain is floating, and my head hurts, but I sit here and continue to work. I'm fucking insane! I would like to thank J35U5 for not only finding a javascript for our new cam-o-rama page, but also for doing the coding for me. The cam pics rotate with each refresh, and feature regular posters of our forum. I also re-did our Celebrities Without Makeup pages, so if you're feeling like a hag due to lack of sleep, check it out. Ok, I'm finally going to bed before my brain disintegrates.
I Wanna Be Your Joey Ramone
 Here's a lame test for you try, if you're totally bored out of your skull to the point of wanting to insert pencil points inside your eyeballs. Otherwise, don't bother. I scored 97 per cent, by cheating. (Although I do have lots of Ramones albums on vinyl.)
Boo!
Burping is fun. Burping is good. Burping is often Misunderstood. Happy Hallowe'en, you motherfuckers!
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