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 I, Dubya: So United States' Emperor George W. Bush is determined to attack Iraq come hell or high water. The rest of the world is basically crying out "NO WAR!" as strongly and as loudly as possible (with the exception of Bush's Shadow, British PM Tony Blair), but it seems old Dubya ain't listening.
"There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again." —George W. Bush, Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002. I can imagine Saddam Hussein was shaking in his boots when he heard that one, that is, if he could understand it. Meanwhile, Iraq is accusing the United States of wanting a war for no reason other than taking over their vast oil fields.  Well no shit. But it seems obvious the U.S. is after more than oil. It's no secret that Dubya and company want to oust Saddam so they can set up another little puppet regime for themselves, just like the one they've got going in Afghanistan. All this empire-building seems vaguely familiar - especially to anyone who has studied ancient history, specifically ancient Roman history.
Which has got me wondering - were Roman Emperor's just as moronic as Dubya? Take Caligula (37-41 A.D.) for example. Caligula used to invite his horse Incitatus to dinner at his home, where he would proceed to offer the horse golden barley and wine from golden goblets. He swore by the animal's life and fortune and even promised to appoint him consul, which luckily never came to pass as Caligula died shortly after that he made that promise. Claudius (41-54 A.D.) is another fine example of ancient Roman leadership. Claudius was the subject of frequent insults. When he took his usual after-dinner nap, those in his company would pelt him with olives and date stones. Others would put slippers on his hands as he lay snoring and then give him a sudden lash with a whip or cane to wake him up, so that he would end up rubbing his eyes with his slippers. I wonder if Cheney or Rumsfield have ever tried that trick on Dubya?! So as it turns out, Rome had a lot more in common with the United States than just empire building. And Dubya really should have studied Roman history because he would be aware of what happened to the Roman Empire in the end - sadly, it fell.
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