 |
| home | email whe | email bex | g*book | forum | bexcam | whecam | cams |
|
The Ungrateful Dead
 Why is it that family members tend to treat you like you’re a doormat?
I had my Aunt Anne (who is only a year older than I) over to my place on Saturday evening, after the baby shower I threw for my sister. It was not a pleasant experience. She drank most of my booze, smoked a lot of my drugs and then still complained when I wasn’t waiting on her hand and foot. And she is probably one of the most brain dead people I know. I had almost forgotten why I hadn't invited her over in a couple of years. The day of the baby shower, Anne calls me on the phone and says she hadn’t had time to pick up a present for my sister yet and she’d slept in that day. Please bear in mind that this is a woman whose only job EVER was working at a t-shirt factory for ONE DAY. Fool that I am, I told her that I had bought plenty of gifts for my sister so she could just give her one of the things I bought and I would buy a card while I was out that morning, as long as she paid me back. Anne was quite pleased with the gift and the card that I chose, and even wanted my sister to read it out loud because: “I pick out the funniest cards, don’t I?” she told everyone. Afterwards, I told her she owed me $25. Her response: “Hmmm, $25 seems pretty expensive, can I see the bill?” Later on, we rented a movie, Castaway, which I paid for. She didn’t even offer to pay half. So, there she was, drinking my beer, watching a movie I paid for and I’m filling a pipe with the drugs I bought and she begins complaining that I didn’t put enough weed in the pipe. “What’re you, cheap?” she said several times. When I told her at one point: “No, you can’t have another one of my beers,” she got very insolent and told me I was a “fucking bitch.” Anne is also quite boring. She has suddenly become obsessed with a new friend of hers, named Irna. Every second word out of her mouth was "Irna does this, Irna does that." At 1 o’clock in the morning, she wanted to phone Irna. She wanted me to bring the 2 ½ hour movie I had rented over to Irna’s the next day and sit there and watch it again because Irna had never seen it. When I said no she got pissed off. What topped it all off though had to have been when I dropped her off at good old Irna’s apartment. Irna asks her if she got the $100 Anne was owed by a friend who actually lives near my place. Anne sheepishly admitted that No, she was too gutless to go over and get the money. So Irna says, “You phone that girl right now and tell her your niece will be over there to get your money.” Anne smiled at me as if to say: “That’d be nice if you did that for me,” and I just said: “I’m not collecting your money for you – no way.” Irna was not impressed with my answer, not that I gave a rat’s ass at that point. As I left Irna’s apartment, relieved out of my mind that I was finally getting rid of my aunt, the two of them were giving me the dirtiest look. It was a rather satisfying feeling as I looked at them both, laughed, wiped my feet on Irna’s doormat and got the hell out of there.
|
